It is been a while since the last time I jotted down some words. It has been a nightmare to be honest. The few people have I talked to tend to tell me that I monopolize the conversations I am involved in. Not that I want to warm people down but I do really think I need help. Nonetheless, most of the psychologist I have seen have shown utter disregard regarding my problem. It is totally inhumane how nowadays doctors in Lima are extremely disrespectful so as to even talk on the phone while seeing their patients.The fact that I have never been forceful has let them take advantage of me. However, now I am trying to change. I definitely feel out of place in most social situations taking place in Peru. Not that I am racist or anything. Be that as it may, people here are used to being too insensitive that it makes me sick to my stomach. I have heard of many suicide cases from teenagers whom did not have a chance to be heard. To be quite honest if push comes to show for many of those children´s lives, nobody cares. It pains me a lot. Many people suffer deeply and nobody gives a darn so as to help them. In my case for instance, there was a nasty teacher that was abusing her authority. I I regret the fact that I never spoke out though. Thus, I started  feeling worse and worse. What I am trying to say is that we have to be bold enough to say what we think out loud every time we see injustices going on. Not to mention, that  there is no point in sickening yourself by swallowing insults and criticism. What is more, there more you assert yourself, the more people respect you. Not only do I need to stop persecuting myself for personal growth, but also to need to get a grip on myself. A friend of mine has been making enquiries so as to get me a good doctor. Given the fact that I have not been lucky enough to get a good doctor. A wise person once told me that if I want to effect change in your life you have to work hard on what it is you want to accomplish. Anyhow, when the situation gets clearer, I would like to go to my school and sort out my papers once and for all. I do want to have an education. Owing to the fact that I do want to find my niche some time in the future. Still and all, I still have to be able to hold down a job. For that to happen though, I am going to have to be able to be of sound mind. I hope get happy enough so that I can light off some fireworks in Christmas. Besides, I do have a reason for building my hopes up and idealize my fantasies. Most the values we grow up with are being debased by the selfishness our own. By no means, can we adopt attitudes that prejuduce our neighbours in an exagerated way. Even evil has its limits. The say that one eats an elephan one bite at a time. Perhaps I need more patience and networking with people who can help me. I will not dispute that life is easy whatsoever. Even so, if parents do not support their children in their vocation, the might end up as the boy from the movie ¨The dead poets society¨

Last night, I had the last rehearsal before I get to sing for the Christmas choir taking place today at the church I am attending now. You see, I kind of had an epiphany on the way home after I got back from the church. Am I starting to realize we all are just people. Thus, there is no need to feel inferior to anybody else. In fact, those who believe to be better than the rest have not certainly being reminded of their previous mistakes. I must add nonetheless, that some wrongly believe that they can manipulate their next of kin only because their mindset conflicts with their own. To be honest, I do take the aforesaid comment personal.  I mean, trying to force someone else to have the same beliefs as you do seems unfair. We live in a society in which families most of the time do not set an appropriate example towards their children. Not to mention that due to technology, nowadays it is a lot harder for new generations to have social interaction. Be that as it may, there are always going to be chances to bond with others. In fact, I for instance feel as I had been deprived of many things during my teenage years. Honestly, sometimes I feel as if the bread had been taken out of my mouth countless times throughout my life. However, there  are many decisions I should have thought through before making. Nonetheless, sometimes emotions take the best out of us. Never will I understand why I oftentimes do the things that I do. Such as for example not to force myself to be more friendly towards the people whom I care about and try to keep in touch with them more often. I guess we all get to have second chances in life though. Lately, I have had the opportunity to meet wonderful people who have given me hope to move on. Have I learned the hard way that twiddling your thumbs while waiting for something to happen does not help you whatsoever. Anyhow, so even though this post has been a little bit shorter than former ones, I will say one more thing before I leave: Remember not to be a dog in the manger. If you happen to have a close one who has a talent you do not possess, do not envy them. Instead, do whatever you can to help them so as to make them better people. Who would not want to have either a daughter or a son who have achieved what perhaps you could accomplish by your own means back when you were their age for instance?

It has been a nice Sunday indeed. Still and all, I yet have to deal with some personal matters. You see, ever since I quit school I exactly have not found a replacement for that activity. I mean, it is true that I am going to a church now besides having gotten a quick training program at an English institute. To be honest, things have picked up. However, I do recognize that I should be more organized from hereon in.

Besides, I have been doing a little bit of research regarding Peter´s book from the bible. Even though I did not get the chance to study the bible thoroughly when I was younger, I am doing it now. Anyhow, so basically I have been meaning to learn a little bit more about this apostle. Thus, the need for me to find out a little more about his life. You see... Peter was one the 12 disciples of Christ. He was in mostly know for having denied Jesus three times before the rooster crowed. Be that as it may, just like everyone else he redeemed himself after a while. His love for Christ was unquestionable. Not to mention that after many years of doing missionary work outside Israel, he got killed after being persecuted.

Although, he did not think of himself worthy enough to die the same way his mentor did. Ergo, he decided to be crucified upside down. In the bible, it is stated that Jesus ordained him so as to be the first pope. ¨The Rock of my Church¨ dialogue in the book of Mathew says so. Remember this: The bible readings are not meant for people who do not want to accept that its teachings are relevant for each person´s every day life. Irrespective of what my next of kin may believe in regards to religion, I am starting to believe that there is in fact a superior being who is taking care of us from up above. Not exactly am I an apologist of Christianity. I am growing into it however.

Lastly, I would say I do not understand how people expect their children to have values if they do not develop them themselves. Albeit, there may be a reason for people to behave the way they do sometimes. The only thing I know is that oftentimes we do not realize that our actions have a lot more relevance that we give to them. I myself confess having let my emotions control me on occasion. I guess most people experience emotional pain at some point of their live though.  By the way I did learn a new word from my friend David: This word is British and is ¨Scatty¨ which is an adjective that means to be forgetful and a bit silly. It is informal though.

How to Deal With Difficult People

It is exactly 04:38 in the morning. I have not actually slept like a log. You see, my worries are so many that I sometimes get lost in thought. What is more, I do not know how many more efforts I have to put out so as to be recognized as a valuable person in the work force. ¨Life is not fair¨- they say. To be honest I agree with that aforesaid statement. Notwithstanding I do recognize having been stubborn when people wanted me not to drop out of school for instance. Still and all, I still got my flare language irrespective of all my mistakes. I do not care for how long I will have to keep trundling the streets looking for a job. Eventually, some good Samaritan will call me. However, I cannot rest on my laurels. I mean it is sad to actually think back to most of the things that have happened to me and see that especially my immediate kin were the ones who actually minded their own business instead of listening to me while still was a child and needed them the most. Notwithstanding, I remember the wise words of this Peruvian poet Cesar Vallejo: ¨There are blows in life so great, I don´t know¨. This world is filled mainly with evil people who do not give a darn about their neighbor´s feelings. Sometimes, I watch with envy how successful individuals saunter by with no preoccupations in their minds whatsoever. What I am trying to say is that I still do not understand is why some are just blessed with prosperity, whereas there are so many people such as myself to whom life has not been mostly fair. My hackles rise when I think about how many evil-doers who have hurt me in the past have gotten away with it without punishment. There are so many people who believe that only because they are not being watched flouting the law, they are going to be able to keep doing it forever. Also, I have realized that it does not matter how much one can fear speaking up against injustice. The worst thing one can do is to allow the wicked get the last laugh. Moreover, it is not that I remain wheeling out the same old excuses in order to justify my bad luck. I mean, regardless of how many more arguments I cite so as to feel less guilty, I do accept that for instance I was not as diligent as I should have been as a child in regards to learning English. Be that is it may, everyone deserves a second chance. Lamentably, I never got mine.

Job Interview Tips - Job Interview Questions and Answers

I am not particularly happy right now, inasmuch as this so called job I had gotten did not turn out to be what I had expected. As much as I would like to reprehend myself for having made yet another mistake, I cannot. May I want my future to sprout. However, there is no way I am going to accomplish that if I do nothing besides writing on this blog. Of course do I need a nine to five job. Be that as it may, am I only going to find it if I keep trying. Despite the fact that negative experiences can indeed curtail your confidence, there is nothing else we have left to do but to move on. One of the most painful things one can do is to burrow into their own past´s bad experiences. Thus, the need to always come up with ways to solving your problems irrespective of your current situation. Be that as it may, I find it hard to start over despite having been passed along quite helpful advice from my closed-ones. How do I expect one day in the foreseeable future to by cherry-picked by a recognized company for an important position among several applicants if I keep eschewing my problems. Perhaps the annoying people who simper at me every time they see me at school might be glad that I am out of their sight for good. Besides, I have to pluck the courage so as to finally get a suitable job for me. There is no time to think about negativity now. May it be hard to remain self-possessed in a hard time. Notwithstanding, it is the best thing to do so as to make better decisions. Regardless of how fearful it might seem to me go up to a worlplace´s counter and ask for a job, I must do it. Have I had enough of being derided by others. If I have to brave a couple of more rejections in order to finally get my ideal job, then so be it. Nonetheless, should start looking as soon as possible. I cannot let anybody else besides the ones who have already done so, keep curtailing my confidence. Maybe now my future does not look rosy. Even so, I will make it look that way. It sure will take me to grope a little more through the darkness towards the right door which will allow me to uncover the light that had been hidden from my sight. As I always say, carping about your issues does not make them go away. Conversely, a lot of hard work and a little hope can turn your life around. Only after I have tried out every possible way to succeed no matter what, will I reap the benefit of my efforts.