Starting Over | Stephany Zoo | TEDxSuzhouWomen

For starters, did I want to apologize for yesterday's post. I really was torn up inside and wanted to quit writing altogether. By no means did I want to alarm anybody. Was I looking for someone's reassurance that could sweep away my pain. Even though I was coming across as a quitter, I was not exactly going against the grain. Have I already posted negative things on this blog before.

 

Still and all, it had been a while since I had done so. Not to mention that I cannot afford to make another false move. Or else, I could lose my job. For some time had I been waiting for a magnanimous soul to help me with my problems. Albeit, I am the one who has to be on top of my hardships.

 

Is it easy to slip back into depression. To stand back up again though is the complete opposite.

Was I told once that if I grabbed a piece of paper, wrote all the things that bothered me, and then rip it up, I would feel much better. Even so, they were wrong. Halfway down my recovery I relapsed terribly this year. Hence, the need for me to start over.

 

Do I not deprecate my achievements. Be that as it may, I admit my English is getting rustier by the minute. That makes me feel as if the ceiling of my home had caved in. Still and all, I have to overcome that feeling. By no means can the highlight of this year can be my depression. Have I failed to seize on every opportunity that has come my way. Thus, do I need to renew my self and not go down the path of despair anymore. My lifeboat rests on God.

MY SUICIDE STORY

Things have gone downhill. Is it extremely hard for me to wake up early every morning. Not to mention that my purpose in life is still unknown. I started this blog in 2013 expecting it to be a success. However, not even a soul takes the time to comment or subscribe to it.

 

Would I like a miracle to sweep away my negative thoughts. Still and all, that is impossible. Am I tired of praying to a probably non-existent god who takes pleasure in watching people suffer. By the way, I should probably not prune this post at all. Given the fact that I am making it concise. Even though I thought that kicking the habit of self-deprecation was going to be easy, it is not. Hence the need for me to give up.

 

Perhaps it is time for me to let it lie and stop writing for a while. The constant reoccurrences of my illness have prevented me from doing a better job. Fear looms over me. Albeit, I do not care anymore. If I stop and scrutinize my life, I could mostly see rejection after rejection and scenes of pain and suffering. It is not a matter of not being able to wake up early or being depressed anymore. My willingness to live has faded away.

 

Before boredom sets in among you, am I going to break this up. Not without thanking each one of you for having at least taken the time to read my posts. Despite the fact that, this is going to be my very last post. I encourage you to keep reading more seasoned bloggers, and keep learning as much as you can from material that can fill you up spiritually. So long.

Protecting Kids Gone Too Far?

It has been almost a week since I last posted. The reason for this is due to my depression coming back for a short time. Even though I try to overcome it, sometimes it is unbearable. Stripping off negative thoughts is not as easy as it seems. Hence, the reason for taking psychological treatments very seriously.

 

For years, has loneliness been one of my traits. Not because I wanted to. Conversely, owing to the fact that it was hard for me to fit in in different social groups. Hence, was it hard for me to break away from my shyness. For instance, the fact that my mother would drive me to school until I was in high school was utterly outrageous. Have I not written the aforesaid statement for you to make fun of me. Still and all, it seems appropriate to me for you to know the hardships I had to go through so as to gain my independence.

 

You know at this point where this post is going. Ergo, am I going to keep on talking about overprotection. Something that certainly boosts dependence among children. Laying down ground rules and grounding your children is seems perfectly OK. Even so, overprotecting them to the point of not letting them go to school alone by the time their are teens seems outrageous. An illustration for this would be an instance when I was trying to go to my English school after my regular classes by the time I was 15 and my mom still wanted to collect me.

 

Last but not least. am I glad that I keep this blog sort of secretly. I would not want people to find out that this 23 year old blogger used to be a mama's boy. Now though, am I a rookie English teacher trying to survive in the world. Be that as it may, do I still need  some seasoned educators to show me the ropes on this profession. Not to mention that number of aspects I have to consider before delivering a good class for children makes my head spin.

5 techniques to speak any language | Sid Efromovich | TEDxUpperEastSide