Have I been on tenterhooks hoping the stuff I was dreaming away would come true. It seems as if my last post had serve as a palliative to my problems. You see I kind of relapsed after my last post. My comments may have become trite. Nonetheless,  am I still writing. It is not as if I was emotionally sterile. Though I was indeed demotivated. Perhaps what had been ailing my mind was my own attitude. You see, before I had broken in myself to exercise and study on a regular basis. I used to hunger for knowledge, to the point in which I was incapable of letting myself be in a bind. Have I not excuses to explain what came over me. I mean I have even had ideas that were going to serve as a springboard for me to succeed. However, I decided to procrastinate instead. Despite the fact that I have emerged from this depression, lots of stupidities have I done once more and I cannot wait to see what transpires. Nor can I turn apoplectic at myself and let my past actions rankle. Perhaps I just needed some tongue-lashing and to be enjoined by somebody to move on. Getting that nonchalant advice from the people around me did not make me wake up to reality. Was I ensnared in my depression once again. No pill or whatnot is going make me feel better if I do not have the conviction that I will.  Besides, my time travel dream is of course a pious hope. I have to prevent my mind from retracing my past dramas. Moreover, I cannot let anything  untoward that happened to me in the past be a excuse not to progress. Once in for all, do I have to go back to being  that pompous boy I once was. Not only do I have to be able to spring out of bed at 5 am every single day once again. This time, I need to have a plan. If I let more doubts surface inside me, only will I hurt myself even more. The only one who can design my blueprint for success is myself. The path to make something out of yourself may be onerous and grueling. It is so worth it though. Every single person on this Earth sustains suffering in order to achieve their goals. Do I hope that this time I do not just do nothing again after expressing my thoughts here. Wanting to be that omnivorous reader I once was, I also wish to develop other skills as well. After all I have done, I do not think there is going to be room for me to be supercilious. Be that as it may, I need my guts to impel me one more time to be secure for real.